


Hoo Boy, I Think My Daughter Is Having Sex

by planetundersiege



Category: Persona 5, Persona Series
Genre: Cafe Leblanc (Persona 5), Crack, Drabble, Embarrassment, F/M, Funny, Misunderstandings, Nervous, Night, Oneshot, Protective Dad, Weird dialogue, dad mode, hoo boy, persona 5 - Freeform, video games - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-23
Updated: 2018-07-23
Packaged: 2019-06-15 00:48:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 522
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15401277
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/planetundersiege/pseuds/planetundersiege
Summary: Sojiro forgets his phone at Leblanc and hears some... questionable sounds coming from upstairs.This is straight up crack.





	Hoo Boy, I Think My Daughter Is Having Sex

Sojiro Sakura was a simple man. He owned a coffee shop, had an adoptive daughter, and did everything he needed to live a normal and happy life. He wouldn’t want it any other way either, Leblanc was a big part of him.

He locked the keys to his house and quickly walked through the streets towards the cafe. It was evening, and he had closed it up, but then realized that his phone was still on the counter. So he would just grab it and see so Futaba and Akira weren’t up to any “funny business” while at it. Akira had been staying with him for a while, but would go home soon, and even though he didn’t like the idea of Futaba dating, there wasn’t much he could do about it. Unless he caught them in the act or so, because then Akira would definitely get castrated.

He soon got there, opened the door and stepped it. As usual, the teens were up in Akira’s room, and he heard… a scream?

“You idiot, you can’t just do that! That’s off limit!”.

“Wait, it is? You didn’t say that before?”.

“It’s off limit for now, you’re such a newbie at this”.

Hoo boy.

“Hey, I’m trying my best. What am I supposed to do? You’re the experienced one Futaba”.

What the hell?

“Yeah but your lack of control is sad. You’re not getting anything done that way, here, give me this”.

“Hey you can’t just take… okay I guess you can”.

“You need to press down hard with your fingers so it’ll register, or else nothing will happen and we’ll be stuck. Come here and I’ll show…”.

Okay this was too much for Sojiro to handle, especially since it was Futaba who seemed to be the one in charge.

“Oh Akira, am I too forward?”.

“Oh, not at all. It’s really fun with you teaching me all of this. Can we try it again? I mean, we’ve got the whole night for ourselves. Do I touch here?”.

Nope, that’s enough.

Sojiro ran up the stairs and literally jumped into the room, ready to kill the black haired teen who was doing that to his daughter.

“STOP TOUCHING MY DAUGH… oh”.

As Sojiro looked around in the room, he sat Futaba and Akira sitting on the floor, in front of the small tv. They were fully dressed (thanks god), and the game console was lighting up. Futaba had thrown her controller to the side and held her hands on Akira’s console to show where he should press the buttons. Both looked in confusion as they saw the startled Sojiro.

“Sojiro, what are you doing here?”, Futaba asked.

“Hoo boy, I forgot my phone and heard you all and… never mind, continue”.

He ran down the stairs, his whole face red and exited Leblanc in a heartbeat. This was so embarrassing, he had entered protective dad mode for no reason and, oh god what would the kids say once they put two and two together, and realized that Sojiro had ran up because he thought they were…

He was way too old for this.


End file.
